October Evenings

Autumn evenings at home might be my favourite thing about September and October. I will spare you all the other reasons I love autumn- I wrote about that a few weeks ago.

It’s starting to get darker earlier. Evenings are longer which means it is acceptable to get into pj’s earlier and hide under a blanket on the sofa. Saying no to social plans gets a little easier as there is no evening sun glaring at you through your living room window as you inform Netflix that you are very much still present and wanting to watch your sixth episode of Riverdale.

There is really only one downside I can think of for autumn. In all its wonderfulness it is getting colder. Whilst this means cosy jumpers and nights in it also means I am about 100x more tempted to drink hot drinks. While I am sat writing this I have a cappuccino to hand.

Caffeine has been very closely linked to high anxiety levels, as sad as that makes me. This is very much the case for myself and whilst giving up coffee over summer was fairly easy, I can’t say no to the pull of a coffee shop on a crisp Friday afternoon. And decaff has no place in my life- if I wanted to drink muddy water I would just go outside and find a puddle.

This has meant that I have spent most nights since I finished university, a month ago, sat up, mind racing and feeling completely worried for no reason. It doesn’t help that any sort of routine I had as a student is now gone.

During one of my 4 am ‘oh my god is the house being robbed? Why is the silence so loud?’ panics I decided it was probably time to make a little bit of a change. There was no reason why someone who spends most of her day in front of a screen should be this tired. My concealer could no longer hide the bags.

When I get into bed I am rarely tired. Realistically my days aren’t too strenuous right now. Swapping out my evening routine of TV until twelve o’clock for an hour at the gym or even better, yoga has meant that all of the things that have pissed me off in the day get left on the running machine and I can go home feeling calm.

Once I get in from the gym all I want to do is get in a very long, cold shower. Having a skin care routine that you actually look forward to doing has made a massive difference to me both mentally and physically. Swapping out a face wipe for what can only be described as the most heavenly smelling face scrub in the world feels a bit indulgent (it absolutely isn’t) which is always nice. Treat yourself.

I used to scoff when my parents would tell me that I wasn’t sleeping because I was on my phone in bed, but annoyingly they have a point. Once I get into bed I am the worst for watching youtube/Netflix/iplayer. I get to 3am wondering why I can’t sleep when I have a little box of light (my phone) two feet away from my face. Hiding my phone from myself and picking up a girly, trashy novel means I end up falling asleep earlier but I’m not bored in the process. ‘Hot Mess’ by Lucy Vine or anything Bridget Jones usually sorts me out.

Lastly, I am really messy. My dad calls my room ‘the swamp’ if that gives you any indication. But I have found that, as much as I hate tidying my room, if my clothes are put away and my draws are sorted I sleep so much better. The hour of pain is worth the good night sleep and no one really likes sleeping under their clothes.

I am not saying my anxiety has completely gone away. I am still drinking maybe a little bit too much coffee and the thought of going to the gym at eight o’clock is sometimes a little bit too much but having more of a routine has definitely left me sleeping better and feeling calmer.

I hope you’re enjoying the long autumn evenings as much as I am.

Autumn is here…

And I couldn’t be happier about it…

It is mid-September, the weather is changing and the leaves are starting to turn orange. I feel like it is pretty safe to say that autumn is well on its way. I love autumn for so many reasons: it means my birthday isn’t too far off which is exciting for everyone, isn’t it? It also means Halloween and dressing up isn’t so long away. The weather gets a little colder and crisper and the trees become far more beautiful. As I have just finished my MA and my brain is well and truly fried I didn’t want to completely fall off the blogging band wagon, so I thought I would write down all the reasons I love autumn (also just to excite myself).

A new start- I know people usually use January or spring as a fresh start but that seems completely illogical to me. I usually see in the New Year a little bit inebriated, no change there. Spring in the UK is rainy and cold and doesn’t have any fun holidays other than Easter, which, after 18 years in education I just associate with revision or dissertation writing. Autumn on the other hand is wonderful. It marks the start of a new academic year, you have all new stationary and a new diary and the memories of summer. Although, for the first time, I won’t be going back to university, this September marks a fresh start back at home, job searching (let’s just hope it doesn’t take too long or this optimism may disappear).

Clothes- I don’t care what anyone says, autumn fashion is infinitely better than any other season. I firmly believe I was put on this earth to wear dark and neutral coloured jumpers, jeans and boots and September is the time for this. Due to the fact that summer in the UK is a little less than delightful I have to (get to) repurchase all of my jeans because they all have holes in from wearing them all summer long. It isn’t yet cold enough for a big coat, so a jumper and denim jacket completely serve their purpose of keeping you warm and cosy. It makes me excited just thinking about it.

Beauty- This is sort of a little extension of autumn fashion but the one thing I hate most about summer is you can’t (I can’t) put a full face of makeup on without it making its way south after an hour of wear. Foundation goes patchy, my lips get dry and eye liner isn’t even an option. On the other hand, autumn is perfect for orangey, bronzey eye shadows and taupe lip stick. Your tan (probably fake like mine) still hangs over from summer so make up looks glowy and warm and stays where it’s supposed to.

The adoption of general cosiness- Basically the things I like to do all year round become far better. I posted about Hygge a while ago, purely because I am a sucker for anything I find on Instagram but autumn is the season of Hygge. Sitting in a coffee shop reading and people watching for hours on end is much more pleasant when your coffee doesn’t give you a hot flush and, instead warms you from the inside out. Call me a child but walks are 100% more enjoyable when there are crunchy leaves on the ground, Beer gardens in mid-summer are nice but I am so ready to be sat, curled up in a big arm chair in the corner of a little pub with a glass of wine.

I feel like there is something in the air when autumn arrives. A sense of excitement forcing me to be more productive. Whatever it is, I am very pleased it is hear, now roll on Halloween.

 

Reserved for ruffians and sailors: How to unsuccessful navigate ‘smart casual’

Who invented the dress code ‘smart casual/? No really? I guarantee they were the type of people who would never be able to pick somewhere to eat but turn down all other suggestions and then not order chips and steal all of yours- AKA the worst kind of people.

Usually when you ask for a dress code it is because you don’t want to get it wrong- smart and casual are two different dress codes and for a girl who spends her life in pyjamas, I need the clarity. Can I turn up in trainers? Should I wear a dress? Can I fool them into believing I’m a grown woman?

Since leaving uni the prospect of real, adult job interviews has been more imminent than ever. It has finally dawned on me that putting in a 9-5 stint of House of Cards isn’t actually sustainable and by September my overdraft will be gone (not that I am already teetering on the cusp of it already).

Obviously different sectors demand different dress codes from staff. I count myself lucky that I can turn up to placements in my outdoor pjs or culottes as they are more commonly known, and it generally falls in line with what everyone else is wearing.

We are taught from such a young age that first impressions matter. Yet no one should judge a book by its cover (wow, all the clichés). How far are you supposed to go in interviews to impress an employer regarding the way you look?

This has stemmed from a very long standing debate with my parents about my facial piercings and wrist tattoo. According to relatives unless I want a job at sea I have severely decremented my chances of employment. A few months ago I was told that the shine off my nose ring or tongue bar could distract an interviewee. I’m easily distracted but really?

As I have written before, it baffles me that people still think they can pass judgement on certain aspects of people’s appearance like it really has anything to do with them. Yet I can’t help but think myself lucky to have chosen a creative sector where such traditional prejudices no longer seem to exist. Basically every other aspect of work life has evolved so why are tattoos still reserved for sailors in some people’s minds?

With body art becoming increasingly socially acceptable, both in and out of the workplace, are people really risking their careers by getting the latest body decoration?

Graduates are constantly told how competitive the work place is and to show a bit of personality in interviews to set themselves apart. Does that translate to- take out all of your piercings and hide your tattoo for god’s sake? I am tempted to say no. I would perhaps question the judgement of someone with a profanity tattooed across their forehead or an offensive symbol but that’s not exactly the majority of people and I am pretty sure if you spoke to them for a few minutes the tattoo would be the least of your worries.

I don’t think people would really consider their body art or piercings as a fashion choice as such and therefore would they count as falling in line with a dress code? Tattoos and piercings are, in some cases, forms of self-expression and can be talking points. It’s fine to not like them, each to their own. But I don’t believe you could consider someone to be unfit for a job because of them.

The Telegraph reported that it is estimated that 1 in 3 young people have at least one tattoo and they’re becoming more popular. Here’s hoping that discrimination towards body modification dies out as the new workforce moves up. But in the meantime, I’ll be keeping mine on show and if someone could just tell me what to wear to interviews (or give me an interview) that would be grand.

 

Not so guilty pleasures

The Danes got a lot of things right as far as I am concerned. Danish pastries have to be the undisputed greatest breakfast creation of all time (apart from coffee obviously). All Scandinavian men and women are effortlessly cool and completely beautiful (an unbiased fact). And lastly, I am aware I am so late to the party but this week I discovered Hygge (pronounced hooghae).

In a week where the RFU cut the professional women’s contracts, Donald Trump announced that he would ban transgender soldiers from the US military and Charlie Guards parents enter their last court appeal for their baby to spend his last days at home, twitter has been a pretty dark place. It was the late discovery of Hygge that saved me from falling down the never ending rabbit hole of the 24/7 news cycle.

Defined as a Danish and Norwegian word which can be described as “a quality of cosiness and comfortable conviviality that engenders a feeling of contentment or well-being”, Hygge is seen as a key aspect of Danish culture. It is basically finding joy and pleasure in the very small things.

Actually leaving the twitter/ my laptop/ the house in general

Initially I wrote it off as some hippy dippy, Instagram solution to feeling stressed out. However, I wrote a few months ago about how I struggle to maintain balance when I am going through down times. I know personally, I can really lose sight of any sort of perspective regarding stress and anxiety when I am faced with a twenty point to-do list, £10 to my name and very imminent deadlines.

Once you get past the images of hands cradling a mug, candles lit at dusk on a picnic table, bikes with woven baskets and child safety seats leaning against a colourful brick wall, Hygge, as a philosophy, does make a lot of sense. Going outside and looking after yourself (inside and out). Taking time out to do the small things you like doing just for yourself- be that reading before you go to sleep with a cup of tea or getting up earlier to have quiet time.

Obviously #Hygge does appeal to me because I’m basic and looking at pictures of artisan coffee and old bookshops is my jam but we so rarely get a chance to sit, in total and complete silence and either do nothing or take the time to do something we love, uninterrupted.

Any other excuse to go for coffee

Everything is so none stop now and we’re all so busy that doing small things we enjoy becomes a source of guilt. If you know you are a nicer person if you have a cup of coffee and some time away from twitter before you get out of bed *cough* me *cough* then do it and don’t feel guilty about it. At the end of the day, it will still be there when you’re done.

I would just like to add that Twitter was not a completely horrendous place. Rihanna met President Macron and the First Lady to chat about girl’s education around the globe. Love Island finished and the tweets between Kem and Chris were everything we could ever hope for and more. If someone wants to commission their own series I am there for it. And last but by no means least President Justin Trudeau is the cover star for Rolling Stone…be still my beating heart!

 

 

 

The Girls by Emma Cline

I don’t know if it is just me but I find that university completely kills my desire to read. I used to love reading- be that novels, non-fiction, biographies but when you have been in a library for ten hours, the last thing you want to do is pick up a book.

After not reading at all last year I made, what I thought would be a really easy resolution (as I am pretty anti-new year’s resolutions). I decided I wanted to read a bit more; maybe a book every one or two months. It is now July and I can finally say I finished a book, cover to cover, for the first time in a very long time.

The book in question was ‘The Girls’ by Emma Cline and oh my word! I cannot remember for the life of me where I first heard of Clines debut novel, whether it was recommended or I was just drawn in by the cover (I’m a sucker for a nice cover).

From start to finish ‘The Girls’ completely broke my heart. It captured my imagination and by the end, well and truly blew my mind. If I am half the writer that Cline is in my lifetime I will be more than overjoyed.

*SPOILER ALERT*

The book is set in two different time periods, following Evie Boyd in the present day and 1960’s California. Disenfranchised by day to day life and estranged from her parents, Evie is lured into a cult by a charismatic leader, Russel and mysteriously beautiful member, Susanne. Mirroring the Manson cult, there is inevitably a bloody conclusion.

The colour in Clines prose and the dreamlike way she describes the lost girls and the ranch they live on is sexy and intensely consuming. You won’t be able to put the book down. While Evie’s situation becomes very foreign to the majority of us, Cline describes the awkwardness of being 14, negotiating the adult world when you aren’t quite a child, so acutely it is like she is telling you exactly how you felt.

I have never come across a writer with such an amazing understanding of the human condition. If you haven’t read it, it is the perfect summer read!