I feel like it is a universal known rule, if its exam period/ end of semester/ any time of heightened stress, ending a relationship just isn’t an acceptable thing to do. Times are already very tough, added stress should be avoided at all costs. But no, here I am still mourning the end of a relationship…
So, here is a little bit of context before I get into how utterly heartbroken I am. I am an inherently nosey person, I can’t help it…I always have been. Sometimes I like to say I am just inquisitive or curious but let’s be real, I just like knowing what’s going on in people lives. This means that I spend a lot of time watching Jeremy Kyle and The Real Housewives of (insert any location, they’re all great). I also spend a lot of time of YouTube watching vloggers. Now, whilst this may all look like harmless procrastination I have actually developed quite the emotional attachment. This emotional investment extended to one couple in particular…Ally and Stevie.
They are the definition of goals!
On Saturday morning I was sat in bed, scrolling through Instagram and thinking about what to have for breakfast when I noticed Stevie had put up a new picture sans Ally. This isn’t abnormal but I started to read the comments…
“I hope you are okay, we still love you, stay strong!”
“you look beautiful keep your head up.”
“I hope you and Ally are okay!”
Oh Lord, heaven forbid…it cannot be true. So I decided to take to twitter (obviously the source of all accurate information) and there it was. Not only had they broken up but they had parted ways two weeks ago…TWO WEEKS AGO! How had I not found out? Had I really sunk into such a hole of dissertation stress and end of term essays that I had become unaware of the world around me!
I then started what I have since called ‘The 4 stages of acceptance’:
Stage 1: The realisation
So I spent the rest of the morning/ early afternoon trying to disprove my finding as a fake. Of course, it couldn’t be true, it must be a joke or a mistake. There is no way in hell that this could be true. After sitting hunched in bed, wearing my duvet as a cape, scrolling frantically down various newsfeeds and consuming copious amounts of coffee as substitution for food I realised…it must be true. Even though I thought this time of year couldn’t get any worse it just has.
Stage 2: The pit of inconsolable despair
WHY? No no no no! How am I supposed to work when I know this is going on in the world? If their love could not last how do I have any hope to maintain long-lasting and loving relationships? This is it, there is no hope! May I add, at this point, I usually have more perspective about life and what is going on in the world and I am fully aware that I don’t personally know these people…but how could they do this to me?
Stage 3: Delusion
This is the stage that, when I look back on it, I am least proud although I wasn’t alone. After breaking the news to Hayley, my girlfriend (and after the warranted grieving that ensued) we decided that although we technically don’t know them, we do really and therefore they will get back together. I mean, their separation could not last considering how perfect for one another they are.
Stage 4: Acceptance
Finally, after many miserable days and tears I finally accepted that, just like them, I too will get through this although life (and procrastination) will never be the same again.
I would like to add that once I finished this mourning process I was watching another of my fav couples Shannon and Cammie. It wasn’t until I had recovered from the heart ache that was the end of ‘Stally’ that I realised it has happened again…Shannon and Cammie had also broken up. Someone bring some tissues and chocolate, I’m not sure I will get through this one.